today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket
today on satan makes a blog post
One time I was on a rollercoaster and a guy’s hat fell off during one of the loops but he caught it when we were right side up again, and i have to go my whole life knowing I’ll never be as cool as that guy.
ASH KETCHUM YOU LUCKY BOY YOU GOT TO DO EVERYTHINGAWESOME IN THE POKEMON WORLD IT’S NOT FAIR ANYMORE
he never got to grow up, spend time with his family, or have a family of his own. he has a 5th grade education at best, hes essentially homeless, and the only friend hes retained through all of his travels is a mouse.
he is literally riding the god of the oceans like a fucking flying horse do you think he gives a rat’s ass about his education
GO BEAST MODE!!!
I feel like most of you don’t understand the reference
GO BEAST MODE!!!
When I lived in Montana, I heard about a man who was one of those “prep for the end of the world” folks. He had some money from working on an oil refinery in Alberta (apparently it’s pretty lucrative), and he was able to retire early and start prepping. The ironic thing about guys like him is that they all think the end of the world will somehow affect them, when in reality no one lives in or cares about Montana. If you want to prepare for the end of the world in order to have an advantage, maybe pick a nice spot in Florida where you can hang out with the alligators and ride the Disney roller coasters after everyone else is gone.
Anyway, this guy starts building a huge fort in the middle of the forest. There weren’t any pictures of it, but according to the man’s press release, it’s the size of a couple football fields put together, at least three stories high, and had some basement levels, too. This thing was huge, with farms, solar panels, a pool, basically anything you would ever need or want after civilization disappears.
After fifteen years of construction, the complex is finally done, and the guy decides to move in to his new fort. Five days later, he gets pneumonia and dies.